I had a revelation/ horrible experience this week. I made a small comment on facebook, but here is the whole story and the thoughts that have happened because of it.
On Thursday I went to the store with all 3 children, I do this more than I want to, but not very often. I mostly have a system, the baby gets put in the wrao and the store has to have a cart with 2 seats for the boys. COSTCO is our most frequent place to shop for everything. Anyway, the boys have he same carseat and have realized that they can switch seats if the moods of both brothers permits. This was not one of the those occasions. Bug wanted to sit in Baba chair but Baba didn't want him too. So he had to sit in his own chair and thus cried all the way to the store. When we got there i performed my usual ritual to get all the kids out of the car, but not into danger routine. This consists of getting both boys unbuckled but not out of the car, while I quickly get Sister situated. This day I got her put in the wrap all the while Bug is complaining that he had to sit in his seat and he didn't want oto be there. Baba is dancing around the car and then I get Baba out of the car, and reach back to get Bug when I realize that he has locked himself back into his seat. Because I have the baby wrapped on me I can not climb into the car anymore to undo the seatbelt. Bug hasn't learned to undo them himself yet. As we are having the battle of wills conversation to teach him to undo his own seat belt the driver of the car next to me arrives and is ready to drive away. In my hurry to get out of his way and keep all the children safe I get Baba back into the car close the door and walk around to the other side to try and continue to help Bug undo his seatbelt. When I get to the other side of the car I realize I have locked both boys into the car, with my bag, keys, phone and all. Baba is technically wedged between the door and the seats, while Bug is in the back locked into his seat. It is 100 degrees outside and I immediately freaked out. I started talking very loudly to myself and pounding on the windows, pulling at the doors and say "I locked my babies in the car, no no, my babies they are in the car" luckily several people took pitty on me and came to help. The first was a young woman with a cell phone. She called AAA for me, but while she was on hold (of course) an older couple came over to see if they could help. They talked me down a little and asked if either child was free. I realized that Baba was but we would need to coax him to the front seat. It took a while for him to get unwedged and then to figure out that we wanted him at the front doors. He touched all the buttons, ALL THE BUTTONS, but he never pushed the unlock hard enoudh, eventually we were able to communicate for him to pull on the handle and open the door. He did, and I couldn't have loved him more. I was so grateful for all these people who were willing to help me. Both boys wre dripping sweat and a little shocked I think, but it was the best shopping trip that we have had. I loved them so much at the moment my patience was better, they were still a little dazed so they didn't run around like crazy, we survived. But that's not important. While they were locked into the car I just kept thinking about how much I love them, I wasn't mad at Bug anymore for locking himself back into his seat. I didn't care that they had been disobedient all day. I didn't mind anything. I just felt LOVE, love love love. These are my babies and we have to deal with alot every day, but I love them and it will be worth it in the end. Another realization I had was how hard I am on Bug sometimes. He is the oldest of three babies now. He himself isn't even 4 yet and sometimes I forget that and treat him like a teenager, he should know how to do everything I want him to do, I shouldn't have to stop and tie his shoe, or help him get dressed or even unlock his seatbelt. I realized I need to stop and allow him to be his age. He will always be the oldest of 3 very close in age children, but that shouldn't stop him from getting to still be a baby sometimes.
There are 3 year olds who still sleep in cribs (not very many), many 3 year olds aren't potty trained, they get to cuddle up with mom and dad all the time and they get to play without consequences. Sadly Bug often doesn't get any o those things, he gets in trouble a lot, just because I need him to be a big boy. Needless to say I am going to try and be more patient and understanding of him and also remember I am not super mom and sometimes I need to stop, step back and play with these AWESOME children.
On another note:
Sister is 5 months old today, I can't believe how time has flown. She is rolling over and babbles constantly, she has started eating solid food and is still just a sweet baby.
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